Friday, January 19, 2007

on an upswing...

blame the meds or the mania.
i don't care.

it ain't over - the funk, that is.
but it's better

and since i am on an upswing - and i'd like to encourage that, thought i'd share a funny that recently occurred.

back in december when i found out i had polyps in my uterus that would have to be removed, i was mortified. and for the record, 'mortified' is WAY too weak a word to describe how i felt.

i could look at my kids and start crying. i researched the condition. this type of thing is not uncommon and is RARELY cancerous. but when it is your body. your uterus. your polyps. reason and sanity evaporate quickly.

so i was emotionally fragile. another gross understatement.

one night in bed, hubby asks "what's wrong."
me - starting to tear up, voice quivering ever so slightly, "i'm scared!"
him - "scared of what?"
me - "that it is going to be cancer." tears flowing freely now. nose starting to run.
him - "CANCER????"
me - "Yeah, CANCER! And I am scared that it can't be cured and i am scared I will die and leave these kids before I get them raised." throat closing up, nose and eyes flowing freely now. wipe both with back of PJ sleeve.
him - "YOU'RE SCARED! I'M THE ONE THAT SHOULD BE SCARED!"

and i know immediately he is thinking about having to raise our three precious little darlings all on his own.

and I start laughing. till it hurts. then crying again. till the sobs start again. i am a tear-stained, snotty mess.

I tell him when i finally can speak, "If i live - that's going to be the title of my book."

Guess I better get to writing, huh?


4 comments:

Anonymous said...

What a great story. I mean about the part where he makes you laugh. Not about the polyps part. I keep having polyps on my cervix, so I know what you're talking about with the scared thing.

Glad you're writing again.

Big Pissy said...

*LOL*

Glad you have your book title! ;-)

Mouthy Girl said...

Get thee to writing!

So glad you're headed on the up-side of things. Doesn't matter if things are changing, you're more tolerant of situations, or the meds are working. Just enjoy!

cadbury_vw said...

i guess one consolation is that it does tell you that he has an idea of what you do and have to put up with

if he was simply clueless...